What’s The Fruit Fly’s Buzz?
In case you missed it, The Fruit Fly’s Buzz is a series of guest posts by some of my favorite Fruit Flies – women who love (but aren’t in love with) gay men. The Fruit Fly’s Buzz is a Top 10 list written to the gay men in their lives – it can be snarky, sassy, bitchy, or sweet. Or all of the above. But most importantly, it comes from their hearts.
I know Tara best as Cake Betch, and she’s one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. But I love her most for her openness and authenticity. Seriously, she’ll tell you about anything – and that’s right up my alley.
Tara writes the wildly popular blog – The Hot Mess Chronicles – where she’s “over-sharing one post at a time”. Go check it out right now. Wait, read her Top 10 first!
Tara’s Top 10
- When we talk your voice and tone and excitement level are always on par with mine. I can’t say this is the case with straight men. I don’t even know if they’re listening to me.
- You’re so freaking cute. I just want to pinch your cheeks. Well, I wouldn’t, because you wouldn’t like that. Maybe I’d just cuddle you, and rock you like a baby. And ask you how you got to be so cute.
- If I ever need to know the TRUTH about my ass size relative to these jeans, I will ask you first. The boyfriend is OBLIGATED to say I look good – it is YOUR job to make sure I’m not lookin a mess.
- You love to gossip just as much as the next girl. So do I. Let’s go to it, cause there is SO MUCH to dish about!
- You’ve always got some kind of special little talent – homemaking, baking, cookies, arts and crafts, painting, SOMETHING. You can’t tell me that you’re gay without me wondering how you’re artistic.
- If I come home and tell my boyfriend that I’m going to kick someone’s face in he tells me to calm down. If I tell that to you boys you’ll put some heels on WITH ME and go kick some face in.
- You’re always so SASSAAAAY! Did you say that properly? Re-read it in your best SASSAAAY voice if you didn’t.
- If I need to find a really cute place in a really cute area you already have that shit on lockdown and are ready to do some tours.
- You keep a cleaner and more well decorated house than I do. Secretly I’m hoping your good tastes will rub off on me. So far it hasn’t worked.
- I admire you for being the strong men and women that you are, standing up for what you believe in, even when ignorance still abounds. You have my love and support.